Most of my life I’ve been busy – I’m always on the go; always doing something; or working on some project. Most of my family members don’t quite understand why I can’t keep still – if I slip up and complain about being tired, they say, “if you would just slow down you won’t be so tired…”
The problem is, I can’t just slow down – there’s too much to do. However, there are times when this exhaustion gets me down and even discourages me a little. It’s discouraging when you wake up tired and don’t know when your next opportunity to sleep will be. It becomes very tempting to just throw in the towel and rest and just forget my responsibilities. But when you’ve got a job or a business or are in school – or you just have goals in general, there are times when you just have to give up on sleep.
Right after I had my youngest, I became so tired and sleep-deprived that it was severely stressing me out. I couldn’t think straight, I was scatter-brained all the time and my hair started shedding.
I wasn’t able to get more than two straight hours of sleep at a time – add that to the prior months of no sleep due to the discomforts that come with pregnancy and I really think as about to snap. By the time my son was three weeks old, I was on the verge of delirium. I could stare at a wall and dream with my eyes open – I was that sleep-deprived.
I must have truly been at the edges of all I could bear, because something happened to me – and it happened almost instantaneously. No, the baby didn’t magically change his sleeping pattern, and no, I didn’t get any more rest. What I got was this: PEACE.
That peace came in a quiet voice that said to me, “You don’t need as much sleep as you think…I wouldn’t let you go one day without receiving everything you need. That includes sleep.”
In other words, I wasn’t getting the amount of sleep that I wanted, but I was getting the amount my body needed to function – to do the things I needed to do and care for my children – all the extra activities: laundry, cleaning, shopping, socializing, watching television, were not necessities and could wait.
When I took a moment to really think about it, I realized that I did get three hours of sleep – and even though my sleep was interrupted, I was able to catch another hour or so when the baby napped. I was still tired, but my attitude had changed. I had peace, so I was no longer upset every time the baby woke me up and I wasn’t grumpy anymore.
When I finally accepted the fact that I wasn’t going to get as much sleep as I’d like, that the sleep I did get would just have to be enough, I felt much better. It felt as if a burden had been lifted.
Now as I find myself in a similar state of exhaustion, not because of the birth of a child, but because of the birth of my business and blogs – I try to remember this example of how God can come in and change the condition of things.
Yes, I whine a little when I have to wake up earlier to get things done, but then a few minutes later I remember the purpose for it all. I’m tired and exhausted all the time because I have goals and dreams I want to accomplish. They require work and sometimes missed sleep. But I’m happy, because everyday that I wake up tired, it’s because of the progress I’m making in my life. When it think of it this way I’m more able to accept it with a cheerful attitude.
Some days I have to pray for God to intervene with a divine energy source – and before I know it, I’m feeling more and more alert. One day I ran across this scripture, and it encouraged me to stay diligent in my efforts:
Love not sleep, lest thou come to poverty; open thine eyes, and thou shalt be satisfied with bread. Proverbs 20:13 (KJV)
I encourage you, if you’re struggling with tiredness and exhaustion, stay diligent in your efforts…your reward is not far off.
What do you do to cope with tiredness and exhaustion when there’s no hope for sleep in sight? How do you keep your sanity?
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Kiesha holds a Master of Arts in English, is a writing instructor and blog consultant.
very interesting point of view sis. however, just try get as much rest as possible. your health may suffer due to your lack of sleep.
BTW sis, I have included you in this award: http://myfewsimplethoughts.blogspot.com/2010/02/my-very-1st-award.html
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Sounds like contentment to me!
If not, then sounds like an opportunity to simplify.
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Kiesha Reply:
February 18th, 2010 at 2:14 pm
@Gina – I’m optimistic, so I’m going to with “contentment”!
@Just simple – believe me, I still get the rest I need, but sometimes, if I can just stand and walk around and get the blood-flowing, I can usually keep on going. I find that when I see my goals coming together, I get energized from within. But thanks for the concern!
Thank you both for stopping by!
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hi kiesha,
how are you?
i can relate to this because i really pushed myself beyond limits this week but i have promised to sleep properly this weekend and if i dont, i will still be happy and fulfilled(although i must rest lol!!)
nice weekend
.-= ayo´s last blog ..Are You Wearing A Disguise =-.
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Kiesha Reply:
February 20th, 2010 at 12:21 am
Hi Ayo,
I just keep trying to keep my eyes on God – as long as Peter did that he stayed above the water; even he was doing the impossible until he looked away. Stayed encouraged; stay energized.
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Yea love your self first and don’t overexert your effort on something that wont make you happy. Think of the things your doing and make some changes about your lifestyle maybe that would make life better.
.-= Trina Colon @ mortgage home vegas´s last blog ..Las Vegas Hard Money Going Limp! =-.
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Very much agree with it..sometimes u need to rest and live your life the way you enjoy it..love yourself..
.-= mobility scooter´s last blog ..Mobility Scooters =-.
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